Madness

Today is so random, it may as well be a Terry Gilliam film. I was sat in bed drinking fresh coffee and reading papers until 12pm. During the course of this session I learned about Deb balls, twins, women who eat every meal of the day in a restaurant, Chanel Sublimage cream and an Australian woman called Lorelei who likes to wear table cloths. Now, I am sat in our beloved Mac Suite wearing a Superman cape, because it's a tad chilly and I'm too lazy to go all the way up to floor three for a top. It was the only thing I could find in here to wear. It was given to me by a lovely Danish lady at work called Lotte, who got loads of free Superman goodies and knew how much I liked him. She didn't want them so I ended up with stationery, a mug, some coasters and this cape. Tremendous. Sadly she left the company some months ago because they decided that someone else could do her job as well as their own instead. We haven't heard about any of the products she used to market since so clearly that was a stroke of genius. On Thursday we got a schedule emailed to us telling us when all the new Cravendale adverts were going to be on. There's two different ones apparently. Great. As if I give a shit. Everyday I resist the urge to email the Cravendale brand team to ask them if they don't think it's a little freaky that cows want their own milk back because they want to drink it themselves. I wouldn't want to drink my own milk. Plus those 'strawberry' cow adverts they put on were akin to some kind of messed up Evil Dead/Omen type film. No, they don't look like strawberries they look like they've escaped a Hammer Horror-esque slaughterhouse where they revelled in rolling about in the blood of their brethren. And don't get me started on the Anchor adverts. What a waste getting Stephen Fry and Tony Robinson to lend their voices to a couple of cartoon bovines so innovatively called 'Cow' and 'Moo.' These people get paid to roll out this crap. Still, I guess they top that highly irritating Frosties advert by miles. Or the Sheila's Wheels one. Or that GHASTLY Picture Loans one where the man so casually checks with his wife that it is in fact 25 grand that they want to borrow. I know I often decide I need a loan and then think, how much did I want again? Before discussing football with a total stranger. But then, the people at Picture are "so easy to talk to."
On Wednesday, we went to see Clerks II, which was a triumph. I knew it was going to be good before we even went in, when the guy who tore off our tickets said "Screen 8 for Clarks Eleven." Bless him and his lack of knowledge about Kevin Smith. Mind you, noone at work had heard of it either, bunch of un-cultured swines. It's people like that who are responsible for programmes like 'Robin Hood' being made. Thank god for the impending return of Futurama. My sanity is in need of saving. By a robot and a pizza delivery boy. Told you. Random.